Why do I get SO mad, SO easily??

[Unregistered]

I have been seeing both a psychiatris, AND a therapist. I "am not" manic deprssive, ADD, bipolar, etc. says my current doctor. She doubts thses as she has had me on every pill that should treat such problems. She has advised me to move on to an "adult psychiatrist" (she is only a nurse practitioner), but that appointment is so far away. I find myself so angry more times than not. I cannot love like I used to. Interact like I used to. I close up, and shut everyone out. Not to mention that I have gained ALOT of weight, which angers me even more. I have been reading a little about stress, and anxiety, but none of that feels like it's me. And I'm losing my mind, not having control. Meet the NEW Jeckyl & Hyde.
Can anyone help?

[searchinsam]

Are you female? When do you get mad or angry? Do you feel disorientated or vague during these times? Become indecisive, irritable and edgy and feel supersensitive during the times of feeling mad or angry? Do you feel worse under certain situations? Are you feeling mad for several days then long time relatively calm? Do you find yourself snacking on more sweet stuff or carbohydrate during this time and find this relaxes you even if it be only for a short time? Need more details.
Agape
searchingsam

[Unregistered]

My anger starts by simple things....wrong comment, wrong look, bad smells bringing up bad memories, etc. Eating is not different from anger to feeling okay. Not a big eater, but you wouldn't know it by looking at me.

[Unregistered]

Hmmm you sound exactly like my husband. His doctors too ruled out Bi-polar. He is working on his outburst by seeing a theripist, every week. He says it is helping him. Were you always very worried when you were growing up? Did you get picked on and were easily to start crying, when you were younger? Do find it extremely hard to trust others? My husband was yes to all of these. I can only recommend a theripist that you are very comfortable with, and one that atually cares about helping you. Have you had your blood tested yet for anything? Maybe that would be a good thing to do. Yes please try to see an "adult theripist" they may understand you more and be able to help you out a lot more. Good luck, and I hope you found something out soon.

[searchingsam]

You sound like you suffer post trauma syndrome with your mention of smells and so forth triggering memories. I got and still suffer the same and it take quite a bit to push it out of my way and not let the past control my life. You dont need meds you need councelling to help you find what has or is traumatising you and help you cope or come to terms with events in your life.
I gained weight also, even when not eating much, and this compounds ones negative feelings and increases the anger.
I am insulin resistant and I know it is in some way responsible for my feelings as it interfers with my body chemistry both emotionally and physically. I hardly have to eat a thing to put weight on and have to near starve myself to loose it. I used to be super thin and when I see myself in the mirror now... well I try not to look in the mirror.
A GTT will confirm if you are insulin resistant. Most doctors do not recognise the serious consequences of IR, and usually associate it with obese people, diabetics. My IR is causing muscle weakness and wasting and has absolutely nothing to do with diabetes or weight. I have been going to docs since I was 12 over my horrible mood swings, uncontrolable anger that scarred the living day lights out of my mum, but it was always the same story; i was a hyperchondriact or had growing pains or both.
Now 37 I am only taken seriously because despite being on testosterone for 6 years I have developed no muscle only muscle wasting like before I was on T. But even now I have to travel to another state of Australia to get checked out becasue a couple of docs here have made their judgment of me. I am IR and possibly growth hormone deficient and deficient also in insulin like growth factor -1, all three have dramatic influence on mood and behaviour. I need a insulin tolerance test to measure growth hormone and so forth. the odd blood test here and there is not sufficient.
If you have any similar deficiencies and post trauma syndrome you have my full understanding. It will be a long haul and with post trauma it is a daily battle. But be reassured there are heaps like you and I out there and we must be persistant with ourselves and those who are supposed to help.
All the best.
searchingsam.

[Unregistered]

I have had some other bloodwork done, such as thyroid, diabetes, glucose, etc. But all always come back normal.
This morning, I decided to scribble down what is on my mind that makes me angry, right at that moment....and in 15 minutes, I had 3 pages FILLED in a legal size pad of paper. I have "paused" to get some work done, but my mind is still going.

[searchingsam]

All the best with your scribbling things down. I found doing such stuff to be very thearoputic and most revealing.
Did you get any insulin readings? I was told mine were normal until I saw the test results for myself and it said I was insulin resistant. Like my insulin read 18 when it should have been under 10!! If I hadnt check this for my self I would still be in the dark and thinking everything was fine though I felt far from it, and wondering why I cant loose weight unless I nearly starve myself. If you aren't a big eater and you are gaining weight the insulin needs to be looked at. Doctors concentrate too much on diabetes when IR is shown in many individauls for many different reasons.
I got so down I just comfort ate and gained 22 kg in about eight months and it has taken forever to get some of it off.
Agape,
searchingsam

[Unregistered]

Well, I get to see my "nurse practitioner" for the last time tonight...hoepfully I can get something to ease this off a bit. I was wondering about printing this conversation of ours, and taking it with me, ONLY because you're name and such is not on it. That way, when I try to explain your suggestions, I have something to look at. I also plan on doing the same with the new doctor in January. I am so glad you're taking the time to talk to me. I appreciate it more than you know!

[searchingsam]

Print anything you feel would beneficial. I wish you all the best and let us know how you get on.
If any doctors and so forth wonder why you've gone to a support message board on the net, tell them you feel it is benefiting you since you feel safe and free to say what you need since no one here is personally involved with your life as so can see you from another prospective.
Agape,
searchingsam

[Unregistered]

Here we go again, as things start to snowball into another huge mess, that weighs too much for me. Husband's being mean and disrespectful, mother having mastectomy, I don't get to spend Christmas with my oldest daighter (15)....plus a few more minor things to top it all off.
Meeting this new doctor in January cannot happen soon enough.