Depression or something else? Help!

[sockmonkey]

Hi,

I'm not sure where to put this really, but Psychiatric seems good enough for now.

First, I'm 20 years old, female. Depression and diabetes run in my family. I had depression a few times before, but I'm not sure it felt like this. It also was usually caused by some event. I also took birth control earlier this year, but stopped because it severely screwed up my moods (i.e., I was ****** off at every little thing all the time - just not myself AT ALL). No drugs, no smoking, some drinking (but lately, alcohol has made me very sick).

For months (maybe over a year), I have not been feeling like myself.

My mind is cloudy or fuzzy, like there's some mass in my brain blocking half of it from working. I barely ever have anything to say to anyone and feel like I'm in a state of perpetual observation. I used to be witty, funny, and wildly creative, and now I just have faint traces of those traits. I'm often tired and my attention span is low; focusing on reading is usually rather hard. My memory is absolutely awful, both short term and long term, and I feel like I'm retaining nothing, just living in the present moment.

I'm SICK of feeling this way. I have good reasons to be depressed this year (two family deaths, one friend diagnosed with disease, another with MRSA, lost a ridiculous amount of money, lived in Europe for four months and returned to the US, and so on), but I'm just not sure that it's that. I don't hate myself, I'm happy with school, I'm finally satisfied with my majors, I'm more than happy with my family and friends, I'm quite capable of laughing and having a good time, I don't lie, I don't skip classes ... I'm in mourning and 2008 is a horrible year, but ... I just don't know what this is.

Any help anyone can offer would be great, thank you!

[ejones7408]

Sockmonkey,

Have you considered seeing a therapist? There are different levels of depression too. You should really get an appointment to see a therpapist, they may be able to help or they may refer you to a psychiatrist. I wish you luck.
Liz

[depression.my.killer]

Sockmonkey,

I know how you feel. For a good year or so, I had the same thing. I was never really there, I couldn't remember much, my focus was off and I just wasn't myself. Oddly, all of it was a build-up of **** from my entire 13 years of life and resulted in becoming suicidal and antisocial. Now, hopefully, your issue hasn't drug you this far. I think it would be best for you to see a theropist and to just talk with them. You might find that it helps a great deal.

Another thing to consider is your diet. Do you exercise regularly? Have you eating habits changed at all during your bout of depression? Are you eating the right amount of vegetables and fruit? Are you getting the right amount of vitamins and minerals? Because depression is normally caused by and imbalance in the brains chemicals, you might just need to eat a bit better and maybe go work out in a gym. I found that both of those helped me a lot. I'm not saying that your fat, just that the chemicals might be messed up. That is what I think happened to me because I wasn't over weight, but when I changed my diet and added a martial arts class, my depression went away and I wasn't suicidal anymore.

Good luck and take care.

Depression.My.Killer

[AshleyHH]

A good psychologist can probably tell if you are depressed. And then if you have to, your PCP can put you on some medication. Maybe just for a few months.

Don't allow yourself to feel so down all the time. It's really not normal.

[Kiera]

I do not think you are depressed. The reason I think that is because you seem to be engaged in your everyday life. You participate in school and feel happy about your majors. You also mention that you are capable of laughing and having a good time, and that is something you definitly would NOT feel if depressed. You are describing symptoms that come with many different diseases, but one of them hypothyroidism.

Hypothyroidism come sneaking up on you and it can take a year and sometimes more from symptoms start until you reach the point where your doctor considers your tests to be off.

Im not saying that this is what you have, but it is worth looking into. And remember you not everyone has every symptom.

Kiera

[emmarene]

i would get my blood tested for anemia and thyroid stimulating hormone if i were you. if those are ruled out it may be depression. i think it could be expected with that kind of mourning for you to "loose" at least a year of your life. you've been through so much. i heard on the radio about how americans as a culture are very poor at morning and that creates a lot of problems. i believe it. if you dont want to try drugs you could do with self cognitive therapy which i always recommend. it will not help the brain fog, however.